How do I stop worrying and obsessing about money?
I’ve recently bought a house with my boyfriend. Obviously finances are now much tighter and although we are able to pay the bills I find myself obsessing and worrying about our money. Even when we have money I’m too scared to spend it. My boyfriend isn’t very good with money and I find myself lying awake at night worrying about what he’s spending it on. Its making me very stressed out and unable to treat myself or do nice things.
Just to clarify, we have a joint account which we put money into to cover bills. We also have joint savings. We pay for our cars and general spending money out of what is left in our own seperate accounts.
September 3rd, 2010 at 1:01 pm
sell the house
September 3rd, 2010 at 1:11 pm
Render unto Ceaser what is Ceasers.
September 3rd, 2010 at 2:02 pm
The problems are never created by others unless we give em loop for it.So sit wit ur boy friend and analyse wat he spends on.Circle the areas wer u find lot money is goin out.Work out the whole areas.If ur goin to stress urself by stayin awake in the night,I swear u hav to shell out two or three times the money u will be savin for ur health.
September 3rd, 2010 at 2:37 pm
Whoa, you bought a house with a BOYfriend….you see, the high-lighted word is **boy**!!! After you buy the house, you find out he-s not good with money; so that makes you the **girl**friend….Sounds like boy/girl were playing-house w-a-a-y too early!!!!!!!!!!!!!
September 3rd, 2010 at 3:12 pm
Try therapy, or start working out. So that you are too tired when you get home and go straight to sleep.
September 3rd, 2010 at 3:25 pm
First off maybe you should sit down with him and talk about your ideas on money and where it should go. You should each set aside your own “allowance” from your combined money to do things with.. That way if he wants something or you want something that the other doesent you can still afford (by saving your “allowance” if need be) to get whatever and not fight about it. Make sure you let him know that you expect him to talk to you before making any large purchases and let him know you will do the same.
September 3rd, 2010 at 3:29 pm
Try writing out a monthly budget with your boyfriend. Do you split the cost for everything in half? Maybe if you came to some type of agreement with him you might feel more comfortable with the finances. You can not control his spending / finances. At least the budget would give you the peace of mind that you are spending your monies according to a budget plan and he has the same opportunities. If he is not responsible financially, it would be better to find out now rather then later. Good luck.
September 3rd, 2010 at 4:17 pm
I sort of agree with Big Ed…but you got some complications in this situation.
Are you in agreement that all income is “Ours”? Or is it that he puts in only a portion into the pot. This is not good!
I’ve shown people how to create a budget on a worksheet. You can project into the future what your finances will be, and can budget your “play” money accordingly. You are nervous because you don’t really have a clue what is coming up. By budgeting, it should help you out.
Do a search on the internet for “budgeting” and get some ideas. If you are still stumped send me an email and I’ll show you how it’s done.
The fact that you now own your home indicated you are off to a good start. Don’t stumble now!